Excuse me for one second, I need to whine.

It is currently 39 degrees and raining, which is probably the worst weather I can imagine. You might say, "How about 33 degrees and raining?" But the closer you come to freezing, the more likely it is that what you actually have is a wintry mix, which, while horrendous, accompanies the possibility that school might close or that it might turn to snow. No, 39 and raining is the worst.

And I must point out that it was simply 39 and cloudy when I left my office 20 minutes ago to walk to the library. A block from my destination, when it was stupid to stop, take off my backpack, and dig out my umbrella, God poked a hole in his waterbed. In an absurdly short amount of time, my jeans were soaked. You know how that is. When you're walking in the rain, for some reason, your thighs take the worst of it. Which is so awesome, because that also happens to be where your pants are the tightest, thus not only clinging inescapably to your skin but also drying incredibly slowly!

And you know the only way to really deal with a situation like this is to take off your pants and put on something so amazingly dry that you do a little dance inside your warm, dry pants. But here I am, all settled into the library for a day of studying, with wet, cold, clingy jeans. Oh, and it's not raining anymore.

I'm taking my pants off.

Also... in other absurd news, Jada Pinkett Smith has a metal band?

Study study study.